Thursday, April 22, 2010

is Platinum Dunes in trouble?

Man, I sure hope so.

Look, it's sad when anyone loses a job or takes a financial hit in this business, but you'll forgive me if I'm not more than a little hopeful at the vauge prospect of "Platinum Dunes" - the Michael Bay affiliated production company specializing mostly in remakes of classic horror movies - having to scale things back. They're output, which has so-far included the abysmal "Texas Chainsaw," "Friday the 13th" and "Hitcher" remakes, has been even worse than you'd expect from an outfit built (literally) on the words "remake" and "Michael Bay."

Bloody-Disgusting, which actually hosts PD's "official" site, reports that one of the company's top dogs, Brad Fuller, has tweeted that the presumed sequel to the "Friday" remake is "dead. Not happening":

All well and good, since the movie was terrible, but color me shocked: It was a good-sized hit, and historically Jason movies have been among the top "what it makes vs what it costs" moneymakers in modern genre film. This is the sort of thing that could've been a cash-cow, providing funding for whatever else they wanted to do. This particular news, coming literally a week before PD's "Nightmare on Elm Street" remake is supposed to hit, doesn't exactly make it look like they're flush with confidence about the future of their brand.

Whatever. If it means they have to scrap their proposed in-name-only "Monster Squad" remake, good riddance to `em.


Drunken Lemur said...

They were going to Remake Monster Squad? Would any of the kids these days even recognize the Universal monsters? How exactly did they plan on changing it?

underthepale said...

Explosions, of course. LOts and lots of explosions. And Dracula was going to be an allegory for the European bloc and why we were right to go into the Middle East.

... Actually, I don't know. I'm saying that so someone can say that whatever Bay was planning was worse.

Dav3 said...

I'll just go ahead and play the ultimate cynic here and point out: if Bay doesn't do it, then someone else will.

There's simply too much easy money to be had repackaging successful old ideas. Why take a risk on anything new or interesting?

Drunken Lemur said...

Oh, I know! Werewolf won't have pants, so it can be obvious that he's got nards! Also Emily will be played by Megan Fox.

Mr_Tinq said...

I'm fairly certain Megan Fox has the acting chops to play any of the voiceless, personality-less masked monsters that have appeared in genre film before.

tyra menendez said...

No, because Megan Fox is, apparently, unable to close her mouth.
Seriously, I tried to watch that Simon Pegg movie, "How to Lose Friends, and Alienate People", and ever scene she was in, I kept wondering if a bug was going to fly in her mouth, or something. She just completely distracted me from everything else going on, in the movie.

Also, you just know this new "Nightmare on Elm Street" is going to suck so hard.

Nathan said...

didn't Paramount used to annually deny the production of new Friday the 13th movies, only to have a new one pop up year after year in theaters. is it at all possible that this is Dunes trying to be clever, or fucked up legal shenanigans surrounding the Paramount/New Line co-ownership of much of the rights?

Anonymous said...

"They're output, which has so-far included the abysmal..."

Don't you mean "their"? Or is this supposed to be some kind of witty word-play, that I missed?