Friday, December 02, 2011

Today I Like McDonalds

I understand and sympathize with the attitude behind San Francisco's goofy "Happy Meal Ban." Yeah, my latent libertarian streak says that if your stupid enough to think a $1 hamburger (which is NOT, by the way, the cheapest food you can get in most areas where such poverty is a major problem so please spare me the histrionics) prepared in 30 seconds is proper day-to-day nutrition you deserve what you get. To some people "too dumb to live" is a cute hyperbolic insult - to me, it often sounds like a solid catch-all public policy...

BUT, that said, I completely "get" not wanting children to suffer for the stupidity of their parents. So yeah, I get where they're coming from; but it's still a foolish, pointless move from a city that seems to have lost it's ability to distinguish between worthwhile liberal social-policy and cartoonish parodies of what right-wing dipshits think liberals are about.

Which is why - despite my mixed feelings on the Fast Food industry (on the one hand I'm not "against" corporations 'preying' on idiots, on the other hand... y'know, kids don't get to choose whether or not they're born to idiot parents) I straight-up LOVE McDonalds' ingeniously dickish "fuck you!" to the ban:

See, SF made a law that said you can't include FREE toy prizes in "kids meals" that don't comply with city nutritional standards; which, of course, seem precisely built to exclude pretty-much anything McDonalds might sell. McD's solution? Raise the price of a Happy Meal by a dime, make the toys something you have to ask for, and call the dime the "price" of the toy. Oh, and that dime? They're giving it to charity. Fuck yeah. Take a bow, Ronald.

To show my solidarity, one appreciator of a high-quality loophole-leaping "fuck you" to another, I'll be making it a point to eat some McDonalds today - y'know, after a 2,000 calorie workout, of course. I haven't been in awhile, what should I get?


Anonymous said...

Eat the toy.

Fett101 said...

So that means I can buy the toy for $.10, right? Because they typically charge $1+ for them I thought.

QSKSw said...

I usually get the Classic Chicken Sandwich, Crispy. I think the McRib is back. I have the sudden urge to start collecting happy meal toys.

Kyle said...

The Double Cheeseburger (2 beef patties, 2 slices of cheese) was on their $1 menu, but prices go up and it couldn't stay so they came up with the "McDouble" 2 beef patties, 1 slice of cheese)for the $1 menu. I actually prefer it to the Double Cheeseburger.

Kyle said...


You should eat the McGangBang.

Order a Double Cheeseburger and a McChicken Sandwich. Pry the Double Cheeseburger in half between the beef patties. Put the McChicken Sandwich in it and eat it as one sandwich.

It is actually pretty good. :)

I'm fat.

Anonymous said...

You can never go wrong with the chicken selects

James said...

I love it when smart people find a way to work around stupid laws.

Also, Angus burgers are the best things McDonalds sells right now, IMO.

KevinCV said...

I haven't had McDonalds in awhile, but dammit that's awesome. Also, I'm in agreement with James. Those Angus burgers are awesome. :)

Anonymous said...

The McGangBang is the only thing I order from McDonalds because it manages to be ridiculously delicious and only cost $2 plus tax. Be sure to get the McDouble instead of the double cheeseburger though, or else they charge you 30% more for a burger that is identical except for the single slice of cheese

Anonymous said...

"Which is why - despite my mixed feelings on the Fast Food industry (on the one hand I'm not "against" corporations 'preying' on idiots, "

So you are supporting fraud by giant corporations?

You support giant corporations tricking the mentally retarded into contracts that they do not understand?

I know you are giving mouth service to feminists because you selfishly think supporting it will get you laid, but can you spare a thought for the psychologically damaged and challenged people in the world? What have they done to you?

Mads said...

+vote for mcgangbang.

Also, you cannot be for this law and still be a libertarian. You cannot like anything about a law that introduces broad legislation to target a single company for a sales practice its customers clearly enjoy.

You want people to eat healthier? Fine. Incentivice that using tax-breaks. Disincentivice things that are unhealthy using taxes. People are still completely free to pick and choose.

It's not a complicated thing to rig the markets for food one way or another. Market conditions change all the time due to all sorts of reasons; people getting too fat and the government having to pay too much for their fat asses seems like a fine reason for changing market conditions.

Unless you want to change insurance to a customer _only_ payment scheme and let everybody who can't pay _die_, of course, if the government provides a safety net, it can damn well provide incentives for not having people rely on it.

And if you don't want those things, go live in a country with free immigration and essentially no government and start growing crops and see how long you last.

Mads said...

@ Anonymous 3:39PM

Dude. STFU.

That's not what bob is saying. Bob is saying people who are able to choose whether or not to be idiots have a _right_ to choose to be idiots, and not be judged too dumb to be able to make their own decisions.

This is implicit in his argument, because people without any option _other_ than being idiots before them aren't acting out of freedom in the first place, so there's no choice to respect to begin with.

His meaning is clearly not that he's ok with defrauding innocents, because he didn't make that explicit. A controversial statement like that _would_ be explicit.

Unless you can't, in which case you're a douchebag (which, apparently, you are), and you need to STFU.

David (The Pants) said...

Mads, my only complaint with your comment was "Also, you cannot be for this law and still be a libertarian." because who cares if you don't abide fully to a label like libertarian? Like what you like, not what is mandated by a label.

I'll vote for the McGangBang because it apparently is a thing. I love their fries, even though their quality is polarized: bad fries are BAD, but good fries are GREAT!

Joe said...

A 2,000 calorie workout? Are you doing a triathlon?

Anonymous said...


It's probably B.S.


Anybody that's an "idiot" (please research this term) is by definition a person who is mentally deficient. In fact U.S. Law says that "idiots" cannot be found guilty of crimes. And being an "idiot" isn't really a matter of choice. It's determined whether you had the right parents and upbringing.

Whom apparently both Bob and you are alright with giant corporations taking advantage of people whose IQs are, by definition, under 30.

Nice people, Libertarians. Somehow more self-righteous than Hardcore Religious types. Is it comfy on the high horse?

Also, choosing to eat at McDonald's for political reasons and regardless of the shitty food is about foolish as you can get. Is it a Libertarian tenet to support business, regardless of quality, because they have the right politics?

Benfea said...


Have you ever lived in a poor urban area? In such places, the only available food is fast food joints, convenience stores, and local restaurants not appreciably different from fast food from a health perspective.

Sofie Liv Pedersen said...

I can't even step into those places without feeling ill from the smell.

But.. sigh, a friend managed to get me hooked on the chocolate milk-shake as he insisted I had to have one as we were driving across the country, so he went into a drive-in and.. it tasted so good... I want one right now..

And well, good for them. It was a dickish stupid mood from the government I can agree to that. Take responsibility dammit!

There's things to do be done! make cooking an obligatory subject in school, so both boys and girls can exsperience how to make good food while tasting, may even figure that it's fun and like it.

instate sport classes, it has been proven that if children move around every-ones in a while, they learn faster.

You know what they always do in Japan and China? both at schools and ordinary work places?
They have collected morning gym! Where everybody moves out and collected stretches their joints! Which I think is part of the reason why they work so much better. Why don't we make that a demandment of all work places? It may even end up becoming fun!

When I was in Vietnam, having a early morning stroll in Zeigon was the most fascinating experience ever! because so early, every-where, people really were doing morning sport routines, and it seemed like they had been at it for a while to. From balancing sword dance, to some people who did something that looked like Zumba, to use the stavies just randomly standing around to make pulls with. that is why they were there :D

Good start at the morning by god! No wonder there was zero fat people, they were all so small (also I spend four weeks over there without seeing a much as one McDonalds, which seemed almost surreal as there has been McDonalds every-where else I have ever been!)

My point just is, if a government want to fight obesity, which they should, there are other ways to do it than being stupid.

biomechanical923 said...

Why do liberals always think that nobody would do anything unhealthy unless they were somehow TRICKED into doing it?

Nobody gets tricked into eating McDonalds.
Nobody gets tricked into smoking cigarettes.

Sometimes people do things because it tastes good and/or feels good.

Anonymous said...

Hey Bob, just an aside - are you tired of comedians or politicians being desribed as "politically incorrect" when what they actually mean is "asshole"? Just saw an ad for a new Bill Maher book.

Yeah, the dollar burger isn't the cheapest food you can get in poor areas - but they ae addictive and fast.

Nobody gets tricked into smoking? Have you ever heard of Camel Joe? Or, you know, peer pressure in general?

biomechanical923 said...

"Nobody gets tricked into smoking? Have you ever heard of Camel Joe? Or, you know, peer pressure in general?"

Have you ever heard of free will?

Mads said...

Also, presuming you're working a couple of jobs, mcdonalds is suddenly the cheapest source of food. Preparation and cooking time for anything but cereal will eat up too much of your time. Evidence:

Upper right hand corne, the green area, under cooking.

So as I said, make it more expensive to eat at mcdonalds through taxation, force them to compete on something other than price.

@ Anonymous 6:42 PM
Yes, because people use the word idiot to mean someone with an IQ less than 30.

Oh wait. Huh. Maybe that definition might not be the primary one. You thought about that? No matter. Let me google that for you:

See the first definition there?

You know damn well that the language has moved. I'm not even sure what the hell your point is with this. _everybody_ knows that the language has why pretend otherwise to make anybody look bad when you know it'll fail?!

freesoftware said...