Thursday, June 21, 2012

Almost Over

"Breaking Dawn" (the book) is probably one of the most dissapointing endings to a "saga" I've ever come across, regardless of the quality of the rest of it. After briefly taking the final "Twilight" on a hard left-turn into the kind of high-end batshit-insanity that bad genre-fiction ought to provide; the whole thing opts to climax in a manner that would get you flunked at a Community College creative-writing class.

Below, the trailer for the movie version. If nothing else, it looks like we'll get a lot more Michael Sheen in this one, which is fine by me - he's one of the only people in the franchise who seems to understand they're making shit and has fun with it (unlike Stewart and Pattinson; who clearly know they're making shit but always look like they're attending their own career's funerals.)

10 comments:

The Dude said...

That's why Breaking Dawn is my favorite, yet simultaneous the most disappointing of the books. They bring in bad ass vampires from around the world who are all way more interesting than Bella or Edward. The second half of the book is pretty much a vampire training montage, but forgets to actually end with a fight. Oh, and wasn't there some guy who stayed in the attic the whole time? What the hell happened with him?

Razmere said...

"After 18 years of being normal. I can finally shine! I was born to be a vampire."


No lie. I almost gagged at how bad that line was.

Popcorn Dave said...

"Almost over" is my thought too. I have a feeling it will fade away nice and fast too... thank God.

Anonymous said...

This looks like they're definitely ending with a fight. Well, it may still be Stephenie Meyer's creepy masturbatory pseudo-fanfic, but hey: progress!

Shark said...

Breaking Dawn will most likely be hated by critics, loved by fans, and make a lot of money when it premieres.

Anonymous said...

Love, love, LOVE that the final "two armies charging" shot has like, maybe twenty people in it. GOD. DAMN.

There isn't a single frame in this trailer that doesn't either look lifted from a dreadful morning soap opera, contain dry, moronic dialogue and acting, or have action that looks like it was shot with malfunctioning stunt gear.

Fallen Angel said...

"We're the same temperature now."

What does that even MEAN?

Otherwise, business as usual, I guess: the CGI werewolves still look terrible, Robert Pattinson still looks like he's constipated, Michael Sheen still looks like he's having a ball, and this trailer is still like the other ones: over-dramaticised, fake-epic bullshit. Who's betting it's gonna be painfully slow for the first hour or so?

Gotta say, I'm actually looking forward to this. Never seen a Twilight film in a cinema before with all the hysterical tween audiences to share it with. Should be fun to see this rubbish finally drag itself over the finish line.

James said...

OT: Bob, I'm a little stunned at your reaction to the Noah "Spoony" Antwiler breakdown. You rail against misogyny in geek culture, and when a prominent internet star engages in a misogynistic tirade, what do you do? You attack the fans for "fueling the fire"? Seriously, your hypocrisy knows no bounds.

Anon1 said...

@James
Honestly James, you would be more productive if you took all the pieces from a Scrabble game and then arranged all the letters together in random order to from some sort of non-nonsensical mess of a word and then posted the results of that. It is amazing the sheer determination you show to be an ass. Also, as much as you claim Bob to be a hypocrite, you are more so. Besides pointing out hypocrisy does not make them any worse of a person or you any better of a person. Whether Bob is a hypocrite is irrelevant, because at the end of the day you are still a jackass and that is much, much, much worse.

Benne said...

I love that the final "epic battle" looks like a flag football game.