Friday, June 22, 2012

Escape to The Movies: "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter"

Sorry for the late posting. Long week.

Also reviewed: "Brave."


27 comments:

James said...

Bob, don't you know that the American South was an awesome society where rich white people get to give blacks the beating they deserve? Why must you be so arrogant and say it's fun to see them turned into blood-sucking fiends? I will destroy you.

Razmere said...

Wow, that's a shame that brave isn't that good. I think I'll still check it out anyway.

Megabyte said...

I can imagine it's fun... making most groups into monsters with a conspiracy is usually a fun time. If anything I just wonder why the north hasn't gotten the treatment yet.... maybe Stepford Wives style? (If it's done well, despite being from the North, I'd enjoy it... well ok, done well and give me something epic behind the scenes.)

v_opposition said...

This movie has so many flaws. I'm disappointed they aren't mentioned.

Disclaimer- I teach U.S. History for a living.

One. This movie seems to play into the historical knowledge of the 16 year trying to remember the things they learned the night before the final. They took that list and made sure to include each of those things.

What are the things you remember about the Civil war, Harriet Tubman, Stephen Douglas, Gettysburg, the Emancipation Proclamation, Gettysburg. There all here so you don't feel dumb.

Two. Timur Bekmabetov is great in the visual department, but the movie is desperatly pared down and has a run time of 105 minutes. It is nearly impossible to do an adaptation of a novel justice when the movie is that short.

3. This movie is lazy. I read the book last year and loved it. However, the movie is so desperate to get you to the next scene that it trivializes relationships and character motivation.

Ugh, just read the book or wait for the Spielberg adaptation.

Anonymous said...

@v_opposition

"There all here so you don't feel dumb." - the American education system at its finest.

motyr said...

Interesting that Brave doesn't live up to the hype. Hype seems to be a recurring theme during the summer of 2012 - THE AVENGERS, PROMETHEUS, and now BRAVE have all had some sort of relationship to the hype surrounding them; in the case of THE AVENGERS, the film lived up and surpassed expectations and hype, and in the cases of PROMETHEUS and BRAVE, those films seem to have not, in the general opinion, lived up to the hype. Furthermore, we have AMAZING SPIDER-MAN and DARK KNIGHT RISES coming out soon, two films that also have hype-relationships; one negative, one positive. It'll be interesting to see if they live up to expectations as well. Have we reached a point where hype colours our expectations of nearly everything? If a film is covered at all in the media, is it automatically given hype?

Voltech said...

At 3:35, did somebody just do a Flash Kick? Maybe this movie really isn't as bad as I thought it'd be.

Well, I've always had a bit of an interest in history, so I guess if my brother wants me to go see it with him, I won't complain...too much.

Another great review as always, Bob.

Anon1 said...

@James
I thinking about posting something along the lines of "Daily reminder: Anything that James posts irrelevant" but then I realized that I don't need to post the obvious. It would be like posting that the sky is blue and air is good.

TheAlmightyNarf said...

So, was I only one thinking "this would make a great JRPG" all through-out Brave?

Nixou said...

"If anything I just wonder why the north hasn't gotten the treatment yet"

It has: the whole "lost cause and heroic southerners" IS the demonizing-the-other-side conspiracy tale.

KevinCV said...

@Anon1 I believe that's actually someone satirizing James' posts by using his name and posting stuff he'd post if he took umbrage with what Bob said about the movie instead of taking umbrage with Bob's political opinions.

However, I do agree with you that his continued harassment of Bob is getting wearisome. Reminds me of this one asshole who wouldn't leave me alone for awhile after I left this one gaming site where he used to give me shit.

On topic, shame "Brave" is average. I still wanna see it, though. However, I'm now more interested than I was before about "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter". I may rent it when it comes out on home video. I love deadpan humor.

Anon1 said...

@ KevinCV
There was a post by James(the real one) but it appears that Bob has deleted the post and rightfully so.

john said...

Brave isn't one of Pixar's greats, but I'm sorry to see so many people here thinking it's underwhelming. It's not, guys (even Bob said so;) it's plenty good (and certainly much better than the trailers made it look,) it's just not Wall-E. Go see it, it's absolutely worth the time.

Bob does raise some fair criticisms of it, but I do have to take issue with his complaint that the solution is too easy to figure out: of course it is, that's pretty much the point. The fact that Merida doesn't cotton on to what really needs to be done right away has a lot less to do with keeping the plot going than with the fact that she's trying not to.

Fallen Angel said...

@James

Coming from a guy who goes out of his fucking way to continually harass Bob on this blog for no valid reason and create several accounts on Twitter to keep stalking him, I'd say that's a bit "hypocritical", don't you? ;)

ON TOPIC: Is Brave the beginning of the decline of Pixar's so-called "golden age" (if there is one)? I've heard a lot of opinions from the female audiences and it looks like they seemed to enjoy it a lot more than others. Maybe like Snow White and the Huntsman, they can identify better with the story.

Anon1 said...

@James
Congratulations James, you have won the worse person on the internet award. Not only have you acknowledged that you are probably(which you defiantly are) a dick, but you refuse to do anything about it. Because after all it takes a classy guy to post comments towards coworkers and employers of people you hate. Its really easy to harass a guy who puts not only his identity, but his career on the internet. I tell you what James. I'm sure everyone here will allow you to post as many dumb, irrelevant, bitter posts as you want as long as we all get your facebook, place of employment, and employers numbers so we can bitch to them about how we disagree with you.
On a side note, it is amazing how many times that bitched at Bob for not acknowledging your comments, yet you never acknowledged mine or anyone-else's comments when we call you out on your obvious bullshit. To be a little (actually a lot) melodramatic:Hypocrite, thy name is you.

Popcorn Dave said...

Guys, seriously, stop feeding the troll. I know everyone wants to show off their snarky putdown skills but the sooner people ignore him, the sooner he'll leave.

On an unrelated note, is anyone else getting blurred photos of numbers in their Captcha box? I can read the important (gibberish text) one okay, but most of the secondary ones are completely unreadable.

I can't quite believe Blogger requires captchas for every post yet is completely inadequate for blocking people like James.

SirRosser said...

Well, I COULD go on a diatribe about how my particular set of Confederate ancestors didn't have slaves, the Union army was burning their shit to the ground, etc. But someone already brought up the subject of lost causes, and I guess this just has to be one. Fortunately, I can take a joke, and I love the action/horror/comedy genre, so I think I'll just kick back and enjoy this one instead.

Anonymous said...

@ Popcorn Dave

Captcha is feeding possible text from Google Maps street view into the system. Anyway, there are methods to block James (and outside of introducing new stuff to Blogger, I'm sure it wouldn't be too hard for a programmer to write a constantly-running script to auto-delete James posts as they come in), but it's not natively supported and an IP ban requires quite a bit of legwork. It just comes down to his decision not to bother.

Popcorn Dave said...

Thanks Anonymous. I'm just assuming Bob's tried all the standard stuff by now, but a bit of googling suggests that Blogger's spam/moderation mechanisms leave a lot to be desired.

adminsmithee said...

I think its a great feat of strenght from pixar to make a "Chick Flick" (prolly under pressure from disney) that guys happely go to and not even realize that they are watching a princes Movie ;)

Anonymous said...

James is the kind of guy worthy of Encyclopedia Dramatica.

TheAlmightyNarf said...

@ the whole Confederacy thing

Oh, how I just love historical white washing... Oh, you thought I was talking about Southern revisionism? No, no... I'm talking about Northern revisionism.

Now, I don't think I need to get into why slavery is wrong, or why the Confederacy essentially being founded on preserving slavery was wrong (just read the Confederate constitution some time), but apparently I do need to get into why the North had absolutely no moral high ground to speak of. Because, while the South may have been built on the bakes of slaves, the North was built on the backs of Chinese style sweat-shop factory workers. And it's the general consensus of most historians that the Southern slaves actually had a far better quality of life then the Northern factory workers. Yes, they were essentially treated like live-stock, but it was in the slave owners best interest to keep their slaves alive and in good health... unlike the Northern factory owners who couldn't care less if their workers stayed alive or in good health, because they saw them as easily disposable and replaceable.

Does that excuses slavery? Of course not. But, it did make the North a bit hypocritical to start a war over it... assuming that's why they did it at all.

See, at best Lincoln invaded and conquered a independent, sovereign nation because he disagreed with the founding principle of said nation. At worst, Lincoln was just blatantly empire building. And considering his flagrant disregard for the constitution and the rather severe war crimes he and his generals committed against the South, I would consider the later far more likely.

As much was people may like a nice simple history with clear heroes and villains, I can't help but feel like the American Civil War as a fight between 2 more or less equally morally bankrupt, self serving forces.

Nixou said...

"And it's the general consensus of most historians that the Southern slaves actually had a far better quality of life then the Northern factory workers"

Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!!
Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!!
Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!!
Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!!
Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!!
Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!!
Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!!
Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!!
Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!!
Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!!
Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!!
Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!!
Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!!
Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!!
Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!! Bullshit Warning!!

Please evacuate the premise: a slaver apologetic douchebag is throwing highly toxic lies while slandering historians.
This is not drill
I repeat
This is not drill
Please evacuate the premise: a slaver apologetic douchebag is throwing highly toxic lies while slandering historians.
I repeat...

TheAlmightyNarf said...

@ Nixou

Did you actually care to make an argument there are you you just going to be fall into Danth's Law from the onset?

SirRosser said...

@ TheAlmightyNarf

Trust me, man, it's no use trying to present this argument on the internet. You might as well go outside and try to dodge rain.

Pyrian said...

Brave is fantastic, in my opinion. Arguing over where it falls in the Pixar continuum does a great disservice to how wonderful it is on its own merits, and in the overall movie continuum.

Anonymous said...

1) Everyone is going to claim everyone else is giving a revisionist version of the civil war. It's the in thing! Point fingers! BLAME SOMEBODY! OVER A MOVIE!!! ABOUT VAMPIRES!!!! OVER POLITICS!!!!

Yeah! That makes you mature! *thumbs up Buddy-Christ style*

2) Actually, no... this movie is literally turning the south into vampires... literal monsters. I have not seen that done to the north yet. And these days, I really do think a Stepford Wives style might be really fun (and pointed) way to do it.